The Appreciative Cashier

Sometimes, in the midst of a crazy shift and six-hour patient waiting times, I can easily forget that I signed up for this job. This forgetfulness can lead to extreme frustration, which only leads to a vicious cycle of being more and more short-fused and less appreciative of our jobs. I don't like these types of days, and I am grateful when I'm reminded that our jobs are not isolated in these frustrations.

A few years back, I was at a local store waiting in a very long cash-out line. It seems that several cashiers had called in sick and the store was trying to cope as best as they could. I picked the shortest of the waiting lines and still was about eight customers back.

I clearly remember the grumbling. It seems that everyone had an opinion of either how to make things go quicker or shared their thoughts they they would never return to this particular store again. How dare them make us wait like this? What were we, cattle or something? I smiled, correlating this to how our ER waiting room mood must be on those hectic days.

Slowly, but steadily, my line advanced to where I was next, following a gentleman who wore an armed-service ball cap. He had grumbled along with everyone else and, by the look on his face, was tired of the waiting. He placed his merchandise on the counter as the cashier greeted him.

"Hello, sir," she said, with a warm smile, "I'm sorry about your long wait. Did you find everything you were looking for?" Her pleasantness, apparently, remained unscathed.

The gentleman ignored her as he pulled out his wallet and a few bills. The cashier, her hair mussed and her make-up long past the point of retouch, was not to be deterred. She continued scanning his merchandise while she spoke. "Oh my, is that your hat, sir?" she asked, pointing to his cap. "I see it states that you are a veteran of the Army."

He touched the brim of his hat as he sized her up, finally returning her smile. "Well, yes, I was in the Army during the Korean War."

"Well, then," she said, now pausing and giving him her undivided attention, "I would like to thank you for your service to our country."

Hey, wait a second here! I had just witnessed something pretty special and neat. I was so caught-off guard and pleased by this cashier's actions that I could only imagine how this gentleman now felt. In fact, he was a completely different fellow after that--talking and joking around until she finished cashing him out.

I was next. "I have to tell you," I said to her after her kind greeting, "that how you handled that gentleman was great. You made his day with your kind words."

"Thank you, but I really do mean it. My grandfather and my father were both in the Army, and my brother is in Iraq right now. I can't even imagine what it would be like to go to war, you know?" She went on to tell me that every customer who goes through her line wearing some form of armed-service clothing gets a "thank you" from her.

She was an inspiration. Despite everything falling apart around her, she never once thought to be huffy or rude and, more so, was handing out compliments and immersing her customers in kindness. She demonstrated that grace-under-fire is not a lost art. If I could, I would have offered her a job in our ER. And lots and lots of money.

Several weeks after this, my wife, my kids and I drove a few hours to a nearby city's zoo, much larger than our local one. We were having a perfect zoo-kind-of-day, sunny and warm, with all the animals out and about within their exhibits. As we were walking down a paved, gently-sloping pathway, away from the exhibits of pacing polar and grizzly bears, we approached a gentleman in a wheelchair, coming from the opposite direction. He had bilateral below-the-knee amputations and was being pushed by what looked to be an adult grandchild. The man was wearing a matching t-shirt and baseball cap.

They read "United States Army."

As we were about to pass him, I stopped and looked at the both of them. "Excuse me," I asked, "but do you need any help pushing your wheelchair up the hill?"

"Why, no," the man in the wheelchair answered, his grandson nodding his agreement, "but thank you for asking. He looked at my children, who had halted by my side, and gave them a crooked, toothy, friendly smile.

I have to admit, I was nervous about what I said next. "Sir," I said, focusing on his clear brown eyes, "I can't help but notice your shirt and cap. Did you serve in the Army?" Was it any of my business?

He didn't seem to mind my question, although he did seem surprised that I had noticed. "Yes," he answered, "that's where I lost both of these." He nodded his attention to his partial legs before clasping his hands to his denim-covered knees. "Lost 'em in Vietnam when I was 24."

"Well, sir," I said, taking a note from the department store cashier, "I thank you for your service to our country. Because of you, my family knows what freedom is." I held out my hand and he took it, shaking it vigorously. I shook his grandson's hand next, and then we parted.

Walking away, I turned back for one last look at an everyday hero, a war veteran. Lucky for me, he was doing the same. Our eyes met. I'm not sure what he read in mine, but I saw the gratefulness emanating from his. I smiled before turning back to my family.

My kids, ages nine, seven, and five at the time, were completely mesmerized. "Daddy," they asked, "did you know that man? And what happened to his legs?" No, I didn't know him, I answered them, before trying my best to explain how he had lost his legs, fighting for our country and defending our freedom.

After my wife and I answered our kids' questions the best we could, we continued on with our day, enveloped in our freedom, each of us walking on two good legs. My family on the paved path, me on a cloud. Man, did that interaction feel good!

As a result of the appreciative cashier, I try to greet every ER patient who has served in the armed forces with a heartfelt thanks. Try it sometime...it will make their day. And yours, too.

To think, this happened only because some cashier, during a busy, hurried moment, was able to remember the more important things in life. She made a difference. And I was there to witness it.

And as always, big thanks for reading. Next post will be Monday, March 8. See you then...

My John Deere Cap

I am a small-town boy now living in a big town. I graduated high school with 92 friends and, although I enjoy my big town, I miss the values and ways that accompany small-town living. Apparently, I'm not alone in my thinking, since four of my six siblings still live in our small town, all within a few miles of my parents' home.

Part of being small-town is that the work and entertainment varies greatly. Work, besides the obvious, may also include mill and factory work, forestry, and farming. Entertainment may include cow-tipping, four-wheeling, snowmobiling, hiking, fishing and hunting. And sports. How did I almost forget about our small-town sports?

Most recently, after visiting my family, I brought one of my dad's baseball caps home to big-town with me. It was a bright-green John Deere hat, one I had borrowed to wear outside for an afternoon while visiting. Besides breaking-in easily, it fit well.

Now, how many of you are familiar with farming? And forestry? John Deere is a stellar company, one that has stood up through the worst of our economy. My father's business relies on the excellence of their heavy-machinery products, especially their skidders and bulldozers. The people who don their John Deere hats are typically farmers and industrial sorts, salt-of-the-earth types. In my small-town hometown, when you wear a John Deere cap, you wear it with pride.

Returning home to big town, it didn't take long for me to learn that wearing a John Deere hat in a suburban area seems to make certain people assume that you are "slow" or "a hick." Or that you are a country-music lover. Or that you pick your nose freely in a big crowd.

That assumption would be wrong. Completely off-base, actually. Frankly, though, I couldn't care less what other people want to assume, but I find it surprising that this assumption actually exists. Anybody who is familiar with farming or knows a farming family is aware that these are some of the most intelligent, brilliant, and hard-working people you will ever come across. What one assumes might be a simple mind could actually be quiet confidence, introspective intelligence, and humility. I'll take this person over a dim-witted owner of a suit and European car any day.

My father and my brothers? Kind and humble, intelligent and easy-going. After obtaining their college degrees, my brothers chose to follow in my father's successful forestry footsteps. If someone chooses to judge them based on the cap they're wearing or their Carhartt overalls, it won't take that person long to realize that their judgment was premature. And it will only take minutes for my brothers to intellectually bulldoze through those wrong assumptions.

Anyway, back to the John Deere cap. I returned to my big town and proudly started wearing my green baseball cap everywhere--to hockey games, the local mall, my children's sporting events, and restaurants. About the only place I didn't wear my cap was at work in the ER. Don't think, though, that I didn't give that some thought.

The first time I noticed that I was being treated differently, for lack of a better word, was in an up-scale department store check-out line. The cashier spoke freely, easily, to the people ahead of me. Then it was my turn. And it was as if the cashier had a control switch to slow down her voice. And s..l..o..w.. down she did, even going so far as to raise her slowed-down voice while she gave me my change back.

"H..e..r..e.. i..s.. y..o..u..r.. c..h..a..n..g..e.., s..i..r..," she shouted, nearly exhausting herself.

I thanked her and walked away scratching my head, puzzled, and not quite connecting that it was all about my John Deere cap.

Next, I was at a local hockey game and the beer caller--you know, the one walking up and down the aisle with a tray of beers to sell--kept stopping beside me and asking if I was ready for a beer yet. Why, I wondered, was he just stopping to ask me? And again, he talked slower. And louder. I would have given him the benefit of the doubt, except I had heard him talk in regular voice to the people across the aisle from me. As bad as I wanted that damn beer, though, I passed each and every time.

More scenarios followed and by then, I knew the reason. My green John Deere cap. Each time, I walked away not knowing whether to smile at these sporadic ignorances or just brush off them off. I do have to say, though, that it was enlightening, this social experiment for one that I was conducting, to see how certain people responded to my cap.

Most recently, I was at my eleven year-old son's basketball game. I, with another father, had run the clock and kept the score during the home games all season. Before the start of this particular game, the referee approached our table to review some last-minute rules. Of course, he talked in normal voice to the other father before turning to me.

"D..o..n..'t.. f..o..r..g..e..t.. t..o.. s..e..t.. t..h..e.. c..l..o..c..k.. f..o..r... ." You get the idea.

After the ref finished and walked away to start the game, the other father turned to me and asked "What was that?" I pointed to my hat and he looked up, read it, and said "You're kidding, right?" He must have been a small-town boy himself. But no, I assured him, I wasn't kidding.

Well, I'm still wearing my hat. Only now, I don't give much thought to the occasional slow-talker whom I may encounter. This experience has enlightened my perceptions of how quickly others can judge you without knowing you. It's not only my John Deere cap, either. It can be cowboy boots, a certain hairstyle, the car you drive, where you're from, your accent, and how you're dressed, among many other things. That list is l..o..n..g.. .

If anything, now I'm a bit more guarded about my first impressions when I walk into a patient's ER room. Heck yeah, first impressions matter. I'm not denying that. But we should give the person an opportunity to show their true colors before we label them as a simpleton, or otherwise. In fact, why do we even need to label them? And what's wrong with being a simpleton? The medical field seems to be filled with them.

So, if you own a John Deere hat, wear it with pride. Let me hear you yell, "Hell, yeah!" Or, better yet, yell "H..e..l..l.. y..e..a..h!"

And if any of you know a good place to purchase some Yosemite Sam mud-flaps, I would be anxious to hear from you. I've been looking for a set to put on my European car.

As always, big thanks for reading. Next post will be Friday, March 5. See you then...